


Supermarket Hell

by Batfink



Series: Winter Wonderland [3]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Anal Sex, Companionable Snark, Domestic Fluff, Driving, Established Relationship, Grocery Shopping, Homicidal Thoughts, M/M, Oral Sex, Snow, Threesome - M/M/M, Winter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-07
Updated: 2015-01-07
Packaged: 2018-03-06 14:40:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,808
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3138005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Batfink/pseuds/Batfink
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When they run out of food in the cabin, Bucky and Tony decide they need to go shopping and bribe Loki to come with them.  Once there though, Bucky has a hard time not murdering anyone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Supermarket Hell

Tony removed his head from the cupboard and stuck it into the fridge before sighing heavily and removing it, pushing the door closed.

“We need to go buy some food.” He huffed. “You pair have cleaned out the kitchen.

Bucky paused in the middle of taking a bite from an apple and raised an eyebrow at him. “Excuse me?” He asked incredulous. “I'm eating an apple.” He waved said apple in Tony's direction. “Have you ever even eaten an apple in your life?”

Tony thought for a moment. “Maybe.” He shrugged gaze shifting to settle on Loki sitting on the sofa, a book in hand. “Did you eat all the pop tarts?”

Loki purposely didn't lift his eyes from his book.

“What is it with Asgardians and pop tarts?” Tony demanded.

Bucky crossed to where Tony was standing in front of the fridge and elbowed him aside so that he could have a look. “Oh crap.” He exclaimed. “We're out of bacon.” He slammed the fridge door and stared at Tony, a panic stricken look on his face. “Get your keys!”

Tony chuckled and headed for the door, Bucky close on his heels. When he got there he plucked a key fob from a hook beside the door before pulling on his jacket and hat. Bucky threw on his jacket too. Both of them then turned to look back at Loki who hadn't moved from his perch on the sofa.

“Come on Lokes.” Tony began. “Let's go.”

Loki shook his head.

“Come on.” Tony insisted. “It'll be faster if we all go. You can choose which flavour of pop tarts you want. Maybe find one you haven't tried before?”

Loki ignored him.

“How about I offer to blow you in the truck on the way back?” Tony was not above bribery.

Still no movement from Loki.

“How about I make Tony buy you a tray of muffins?” Bucky decided to help. Loki raised his head and looked towards them. “Apple and Cinnamon.” Bucky added in a sing-song voice. “Your favourite.”

Loki was off the sofa and out the door before either of them realised he was moving.

“Muffins?” Tony tilted his head to look at Bucky. “He chose muffins over a blow job? What the hell is wrong with him?”

“To be fair. He gets the muffins a lot less frequently.” Bucky grinned stepping outside after him.

Tony followed with a huff, pulling the door shut behind himself, leaving Jarvis to lock up.

They crossed to the barn. Thankfully it hadn't snowed since the last time they were in there so Bucky didn't need to shovel any more snow.

A large black pick-up truck sat imposingly to one side next to the car that they had arrived in. There had been a lot less snow back then.

Bucky glanced at Tony as he approached the truck. “Have you ever driven in this kind of snow before?” He asked.

Tony shook his head. “How hard can it be? I bought the best truck for the job.”

Bucky stopped him and plucked the key fob from his hand. “Oh hell no. Today is not a good day to die.” He glanced around the barn. “Tell me you got chains?”

“And handcuffs?” Loki muttered under his breath.

“Of course I did.” Tony protested leaning over into the bed of the truck and hefting out the snow chains, dropping them to the floor.

“And do you have any idea how to attach them?” Bucky asked picking up one set.

“Ummmm.” Tony looked sheepish. “No.”

Bucky sighed and moved towards one of the wheels. Loki rolled his eyes and waved a hand. All four sets of snow chains disappeared briefly before reappearing on the wheels. “While we're young.” He mocked.

“I'm pretty sure you passed young about a thousand years ago, Lokes.” Tony sniggered.

Loki glared at him. “By Asgardian standards I am barely an adult. You on the other hand...”

Tony scowled at him. “Just get in the truck.”

Loki and Tony clambered onto the bench seat, while Bucky slid behind the wheel and pushed the button to start the engine. As the truck edged its way forwards onto the snow he glanced towards them. “Now would be a good time to offer a bribe to whatever gods you believe in to get us there in one piece.”

Tony looked at Loki. “Hey god boy... how many muffins will it take to stop us sliding into the ditch?”

“You're hilarious Stark.” Loki rolled his eyes again.

Tony laughed and pulled him in for a kiss.

“Hey!” Bucky exclaimed. “Knock that off. I need to concentrate.”

Tony and Loki broke apart.

Tony's cabin was a good way from civilisation so it took them almost an hour to reach a road that had actually been ploughed. After that, it was another twenty minutes before they reached the supermarket. By this time Bucky was pretty pissed. It had been hard enough even with the snow chains to follow the winding tracks and keep the truck from sliding around, without having to break up a snogging session between Tony and Loki approximately every ten minutes. They were incredibly distracting what with the moaning and the tongues and the hands in places they shouldn't be if they didn't want Bucky to crash because he was staring at them.

He slid out of the cab, slamming the door behind him and stomped off in the direction of the supermarket door. Tony collected a trolley and Loki followed behind.

“Okay. You guys get milk and cheese.” Tony informed them. “Oh and fruit.” He smiled at a scowling Bucky. “I'll get the rest.” He pushed the trolley forward and disappeared up one of the aisles.

“I'll get the fruit.” Bucky said, pointing in the direction of an aisle with a sign over it saying milk. “If you start with the milk.”

Loki nodded and trotted off in the direction Bucky had pointed.

The supermarket was busy and Bucky was already in a bad mood. He wanted to get out as quickly as possible so he headed straight for the bags of apples figuring he could make do with just those. He had just picked up the bag when a small child rammed him with a trolley. The wheel banging sharply off his ankle.

Bucky ground his teeth together and took a deep breath before heading towards the milk aisle. He was just about to round the corner into the aisle when a man with a basket swung around the corner and collided with his non-metal shoulder. Not bothering to acknowledge him the man carried on walking.

Bucky paused. Ground his teeth some more and took another deep breath. He would not get homicidal in the supermarket. Honest he wouldn't. He turned into the milk aisle and a smile immediately sprang to his lips.

Loki was standing at the other end of the aisle and the look on his face, a mixture of horror and dismay filled Bucky with a great sense of relief. He wasn't the only one having homicidal thoughts in the supermarket. He walked towards Loki, scooping up a large bottle of milk as he went.

“Why the fuck do they need so many different types of milk?” Loki demanded when Bucky drew level with him.

“I have no idea.” Bucky replied holding up the bottle. “This one.”

Loki took it from him and stared at it. “How do you know?”

Bucky grinned a bit more. “Photographic memory. This is the one Tony buys.”

“Thank fuck.” Loki sighed. “I was sure I was going to be here all day. He looked at Bucky relief evident on his face. “I could kiss you.”

Bucky stepped closer and tilted his mouth towards Loki's. “Don't let me stop you.” He whispered and Loki closed the distance pressing their lips together.

They stayed like that for a long moment before both of them were suddenly assaulted from the side by a shopping trolley rammed into them. They sprang apart, heads whipping around to chastise their attacker only to find Tony glaring at them from behind the now full shopping trolley.

“Seriously.” He growled. “I'm running about all over this damn place getting you bastards food and you're making out in the first damn aisle you came to with only a bottle of milk to show for it?”

“And some apples.” Bucky sniggered holding up the bag as Loki placed the milk into the trolley.

“I hate you both.” Tony huffed.

They sidled up on either side of him and each nuzzled into his neck.

“No you don't.” Loki whispered.

Tony narrowed his eyes. “No, I don't, but I'm working on it. I think I'll eat all these muffins for starters.” He gestured towards the tray of muffins sitting on the top of the other items in the trolley.

“You wouldn't dare.” Loki's eyes went wide.

“You have one minute to get the cheese before I show you exactly what I would dare.” Tony challenged.

Loki darted off around the corner into the next aisle. “Oh hell.” Bucky muttered hurrying after him as he didn't want a repeat of the milk incident. Loki was on the clock now and would freak out if he didn't know which cheese to get.

A short while later they were through the checkout and had loaded all the bags into the back of the pick-up. Bucky slid back behind the wheel and heaved a sigh of relief as he pulled the door shut. He would take driving on snow slicked back roads over supermarkets any day. He was so glad that when they were back in the Tower Tony had their groceries delivered so he didn't have to endure this regularly.

As he started the engine and pulled out of the car park he became aware that Tony and Loki were whispering to each other and giggling quietly. “What are you two up to?” He asked not looking at them.

“I was attempting to hold Tony to his earlier offer to blow me.” Loki giggled.

“Try it.” Bucky growled his fingers tightening on the steering wheel. “And I'll drive us off that bridge we have to cross a few miles up the road.

Tony snorted in surprise. “Someone's testy.”

“Fuck you.” Bucky snapped, pressing his foot down harder on the accelerator.

“We'll have to save the fucking until we get home.” Tony grinned shuffling over towards Bucky and running his hand up Bucky's thigh.

The pick-up swerved slightly and Bucky cursed as he pulled it back into line, smacking at Tony's hand where it still rested on his thigh. “Both of you. Face forward. Hands on the dashboard. No talking until we get back to the cabin.”

When neither of them moved to comply he snarled at them. “NOW! Or you can both ride in the back.”

Loki laughed but put his hands on the dashboard. Tony reluctantly did the same after Bucky shot him a particularly murderous glance before accelerating just a little bit more.

The trip back to the cabin was rather quicker and a lot more rattled as Bucky seemed to take great delight in swerving the truck into large snow drifts and letting it skid on purpose. He was in a far better mood by the time they reached the cabin. Tony and Loki however were actually glad to have been made to put their hands on the dashboard as it had given them an excuse to hold on. Tony had even at one stage re-evaluated his choice of gods to pray to.

As they approached the barn, Bucky quickly pulled on the hand break and yanked the wheel around causing the truck to slide on the snow and flip itself around in a perfect 180. When it stopped sliding, he threw it in reverse and backed into the barn with a maniacal laugh of the type which was usually only heard from Loki.

Loki for his part was staring at Bucky. “You're insane!”

Bucky cackled some more and hopped out of the cab. “Takes one to know one.” He sang as he lifted a few of the bags from the back of the truck and headed towards the cabin leaving the rest to Tony and Loki.

As he approached the cabin, the door swung open for him. “Thanks Jarvis.” He smiled and carried the bags into the kitchen where he set about emptying them as Tony and Loki hustled in the door with the other bags.

Once the shopping was away Loki turned to Tony. “I believe you still owe me one.” He grinned wrapping his arms around Tony's waist and pulling him close.

Tony tilted his head to nip at Loki's neck. “Come on then.” He turned and pulled Loki out of the kitchen. “Let's go Buckster.” He added as they passed Bucky.

The three of them quickly made their way upstairs to the bedroom, pulling off clothes as they went. Loki was the first to hop onto the bed positioning himself on his hands and knees in the middle of the mattress. “Come and get me.” He purred as Tony and Bucky dived onto the bed.

Tony grabbed Bucky by his metal shoulder and pulled him in for a kiss, hot and fierce with plenty of tongue and teeth. Loki sat back on his heels and wrapped a hand around each of their cocks as they kissed stroking them until they were both hard.

After a few moments Tony pulled away from Bucky and moved up the bed. Loki resumed his position on his hands and knees and Tony slid underneath him positioning himself so that he was in the right place to open his mouth for Loki's cock. Loki lowered his head and placed his mouth around Tony's cock also.

Bucky moved to the bedside table and got some lube for his hands then crawled over until he was kneeling behind Loki. Nudging his knees further apart before running his hands over his hips and down over his ass. Gently he pressed a slick finger into Loki followed quickly by another. Loki hissed around Tony's cock and clenched his ass muscles around Bucky's fingers.

Bucky curled his fingers and parted them as much as he could to stretch Loki out smiling as Loki twitched back towards him despite what Tony was doing to his cock.

He slid his fingers out and quickly applied lube to his cock before lining it up with Loki's ass. He had intended to slide in slowly, but Tony was clearly doing too good a job with his tongue as no sooner had he eased his tip into Loki, Loki thrust backwards onto his cock all the way down.

Bucky chuckled and shifted his knees until he was closer against Loki, hands positioned on his hips as he pulled out and thrust back in hard pulling back on Loki's hips.

Tony squealed releasing Loki's cock. “Hey, watch the teeth.” He groaned.

Loki pulled back slightly from Tony's cock. “My apologies. He, caught me off guard.”

Bucky laughed and rocked forwards against Loki's ass again making Loki groan even as he resumed sucking Tony, although with a bit more urgency.

Tony came quickly under the onslaught of Loki's renewed enthusiasm but he continued to swirl his tongue around Loki's cock as Bucky continued to rock against his ass.

Loki was known as having the most stamina out of the three of them and was usually the last to come, but Bucky still had some residual anger left over from the supermarket trip so he set a relentless pace. Angling his hips just so, to ensure he was hitting Loki's prostate on every push. Holding onto his own control with a steely grip not unlike the one currently leaving bruises on Loki's hip.

Eventually, despite his best efforts and because of the combined best efforts of Bucky's cock and Tony's tongue, plus the addition of one of Tony's hands sneaking up to fondle his balls. Loki came with a breathy groan before Bucky.

Tony had however sneaked his other hand up to fondle Bucky's balls and therefore Bucky was only just able to hold on until Loki's ass muscles clamped down on his cock while he twitched before him.

Bucky slipped free when Loki's muscles relaxed enough to let him and they both collapsed down onto the bed in a tangle of limbs. Tony flipped himself around so that he was the same way up as they were and snuggled back against Loki who was currently lying with his back to Bucky's chest.

“Whose turn is it to make dinner?” Tony asked and was promptly hit with a pillow by Bucky. “I take it that means it's your turn.” Tony chuckled.

“Just give me five minutes would you.” Bucky huffed and Tony laughed properly, Loki joining in.

**Author's Note:**

> I came up with this after a trip to the supermarket on a really crowded day, we usually go when it is less busy but over the holidays there was no such time.
> 
> I had a few homicidal thoughts of my own while there and then began to wonder how an assassin might fare in the same situation.


End file.
